Brazil nut - Denilson in denial

Picture courtesy Ronnie Macdonald

I almost literally laughed my ass off this morning when I read that Denilson had said he wants to leave Arsenal because he hadn't won any trophies in five years.

Speaking to The Sun, the perennial underachiever, who now cannot even make the bench for most matches and has been a key reason for many recent Arsenal defeats, said:

"This has been the worst season of my life and I am so upset, so frustrated. I am a winner and I came here to win trophies but I've been here for five years and won nothing. A footballer's career is over very quickly so it is time for me to move on."

A winner? Give me strength! As if that wasn't funny enough, he went on to say:

"I can't see myself returning in a Chelsea shirt, or Liverpool or Manchester City - and definitely not Tottenham. I think my future will be Italy or Spain."

Nor can I. As if any of those clubs would want him.

Speaking about Arsene Wenger, he said:

"I went to see him and told him of my decision and he understood. He says he will not stand in my way and if the club receive a good offer for me I can go."

I would be surprised if Arsene Wenger managed to keep a straight face. Not stand in his way? If I were Wenger I'd hold the door open for him as he left. Hell, I'd even drive him to the airport myself if it would get him out of the door more quickly.

Finally, in a moment of lucidity, the Brazilian said:

"I know some people will think I am crazy. They are right."

Yep, no arguments from me there.

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Brazil nut - Denilson in denial